There is a light that never goes out
by CandyForever1
Summary: "It was so intense, so perfect, just too much for them to handle"...- A story about an intense attraction and a very damaged relationship. Rated M for strong sexual content in later chapters.
1. Chapter 1

"Goddamit..." Eric mumbled to himself as he looked at the figure on the other side of his bed. It had happened again. He would go out, get to drunk and wake up to a naked woman in his bed. There was a time that he was all up for meaningless sex, especially when he could remember it properly the next morning, but now it was getting old. It just wasn't worth his time anymore. He wanted to earn someone, he wanted a real challenge, it was all just too easy for him, and honestly boring.  
He got up, got dressed and woke the woman on the bed, it was a familiar face as usual, since South Park is a very small town, this time it was one of the raisins girls, Porsche. She wore a big smile on her face... apparently, alcohol didn't affect his performance that much, for the afterglow was pretty much still there... At the age of 17, Eric had grown into a very attractive and well-built young man, girls would often take the opportunity to be in the tall and strong Hockey player's bed.

After he told her to fuck off (being the huge asshole that he still is) Eric took a long cold shower and got dressed to school.

Someone told Eric one day that if he applied himself better, he might have better chances of becoming a notorious business man in the future, therefor, earning his 10 million dollars. So he did, and even though he is far from being well behaved, he has pretty good grades and now he is competing with Kyle and Wendy on the top of the class...Ugh, Wendy... that bitch... Just the tough of her made Eric's head hurt.

At school, Wendy had been already on her desk. Alone in the empty classroom, she caught herself thinking about the events of the previous night. Bebe had made her go to a stupid music festival on a school night, but she just couldn't say no to her best friend.. It was awful, the music was terrible and Bebe had too much to drink as usual. But the worst part was that Eric Cartman was there, dancing with some whore that was all over him. It was not the first time she caught him making out furiously with some random girl, but it really didn't matter, because she would always feel like she was about to lose her shit.

Wendy had it bad for Carman, and she couldn't stand seeing him with someone else, it was painful… She broke up with Stan in freshman year over some stupid fight, she actually saw the perfect chance for her to pretend like she was really hurt over whatever reason they were fighting about to break up with him. Wendy didn't love him anymore, she was too much in love with someone else, and that killed her every day..

It's certainly not easy to be completely crazy about the town asshole, the one person that hates you. He was one her mind 24/7, his hazel eyes and messy hair hunted her. Her feeling started in ninth grade, when they had to prepare a speech for debate class together. Spending that much time with him messed her head up a bit. He was a real jerk, but also very intriguing, and incredibly smart. Her interest in him developed day by day, and she started to notice just how attractive he was starting to become, and how sexy she found him to be. "Fuck…" she said to herself trying once more to understand why was she lusting over him so badly when all he did was push her away with his insults and schemes. Of course no one knew about this, no one could.. It was just to embarrassing, everyone knew he hated her, and more importantly, everyone knew how much of an asshole he could be. He had gotten more mature over the years, but he was still a manipulative son of a bitch.

She was lost in her thoughts when Bebe burst into the room rambling to Heidi about how awesome the night was and how she went home with Clyde…Here we go again…

"What the fuck dude, blow that shit in someone else's face" Kyle hated when Cartman smoked near him, if Kyle got home smelling like cigarettes his mom would lose her shit.

"Chill out Jew, it's just smoke.."

"Yeah, smoke that kills, not that I care if you die, I just don't want to smell like you, fatass"

"Whatever asshole, just go hang somewhere else, this wall is my smoking spot, besides the class will start in a few minutes, so beat it already"

"I am waiting for Stan, he told me to meet here"

" Goddamit, then I'll get the fuck out of here before you to start fagging out in my face"

"Fuck you shitface"

After the usual insult exchange with Kyle, Eric went to his classroom where he found his usual chair occupied by that stupid bitch Wendy

"Ay, get your lame ass out of my fucking chair; you might infect it with your hippie germs"

"Fuck you Cartman, I was just talking to Bebe and Heidi"

"I don't fucking care, don't sit in my spot you dirty bitch"

"An 'excuse me' would do.."

"Ok, excuse me hippie skank, get the fuck out of my chair please. Thank you"

Wendy was fumigating with anger, God, he was such a dick! She stood up, looked at him dead in the eye and said "one day you are going to end up alone, and you'll be sorry that you were such an asshole to everyone"

When Wendy said that, Eric immediately felt a punch in his heart. She was so right, he wanted not to care but for some reason he just couldn't, not when it was her talking… she messed with his head so much, ever since that summer last year, he was having trouble facing her. That summer night at Tokens party, that one drunken kiss they shared had so much passion. Why? He knew he had this huge stupid crush on her since third grade, but why did she give in to his kiss that way? He was the one to make the first move and kiss her during a stupid argument, he did it completely out of nowhere, and as soon as the kiss started, she practically threw her small self into his arms. It was so intense, so perfect, just too much for them to handle, especially with the kind of relationship that they had. They hated each other…right? Eric was sure that she was just drunk and horny or something, she could never feel the same way about him. He was so scared of giving into her that he made sure to stay the fuck away from her ever since that night. They never spoke about it afterwards but that kiss was on Eric's head every day.

Wendy sat down on her own chair just as the teacher walked in and the class started.

"So, Wendy, are you ready for Tokes spring party this year?" Bebe said with a grin

"Not really, I usually get too drunk with all those drinking games"

"And what's wrong with getting a bit too drunk once a year?"

Token didn't throw many parties, but when he did, it was crazy, too many people, too many drinks, too many unexpected couples making out.

"I don't know…"

"It'll be on Friday, you'll have plenty of time to figure that out until then, but pleeease go with me!"

It was difficult for Wendy to say no to Bebe, but she was honestly very scared, if Cartman started to hit on someone while she was drunk, who knows if she could keep her self-control? At this point she was overflowing with emotions. This strong desire she had for Eric had been trapped there for years now, and it was overbearing. She knew better to stay away from drinks near him…

The rest of the week was all too usual, she would have a feel heated arguments with Cartman, gossip around with her friends and avoid Stan. He would always be looking at her like a creep, and she didn't know how to deal with it, so it was best to avoid the awkwardness. He is a good guy, but it just couldn't work out anymore, besides, it would be unfair to him..

When Friday came, she was still having doubts about going to Tokens party, but at some point she figured 'what the hell?' even if something happens, it's better that living a dull life with no excitement whatsoever.

Bebe arrived at Wendy's at 7pm sharp; they ran upstairs to get dressed. Wendy wanted to look her best, so she needed a friend's advice, and Bebe was the perfect person to do the job since she was always looking good. Wendy pulled out a very small and tight dress that would show up her curves and slim figure, she really didn't care if she looked a bit slutty; she just wanted to outdo the other girls just for this one time. Her long dark hair was perfectly hanging in her waist line, and her makeup complemented her almond shape blue eyes and bumped lips, she was stunning.. and so was Bebe, but hell, Bebe was always perfect…

After about two hours they headed out on Bebe's car, Token's house was about fifteen minutes away, on the rich side of the small town. The girls were excited; Tokens house was the perfect one for a party.

When they got there, Bebe parked on the driveway, and Wendy spotted the big black truck that belong to Eric, he was already there. Her heart was already racing..

Stepping inside she could hear the loud music in the back yard. The house was crowded!

Meanwhile, Eric was having one of his usual pointless arguments with Kyle, this time, it was over how fucking lame it was that Kyle was still a virgin at the age of seventeen.

"There is nothing wrong with being a virgin Cartman, I had my chances but I am just not ready okay? Just because you are a big slut, doesn't mean that everyone else should be, asswipe"

"Please Khal , your palms are so hairy that I have no idea how that beer that you're holding didn't slip yet, you are just a virgin because you are a scrawny jew with absolute no sex appeal"

"And you are a fucking fat son of a bitch that I would doubt is not a virgin…that is, if I hadn't caught you with Annie in the bathroom that one time…gross…"

" Don't call me fat you peace of crap, and you probably loved it Khal, you jewfag."

"Whatever asshole, AND STOP BLOWING THAT SHIT ON MY FACE"

"So get the fuck away from me when I'm smoking you asshole!"

"Are you guys done? Holy shit it's fucking impossible to have a nice normal conversation without you two starting on some fight." Stan said sounding very frustrated

"That's just cause Khal is sexually frustrated and has a shit ton of sand up his vagina all the time"

"THERE IS NO SAND IN MY VAGINA"

"Go get some pills for that PMS of yours, you stupid kike son of a…." Cartman couldn't finish his insult as he spotted Wendy, wow, she was absolutely gorgeous. He was already starting to sweat looking at her curvy awesome body in that tight little dress. God, he wishes he could just rip that dress off. He stayed there, staring at her, a little bit longer that he should.

"Cartman?" Stan said, right before he noticed who Cartman was staring at. Stan immediately felt very unconfutable and jealous at the same time, stupid fat peace of shit was looking ate his Wendy?

"Take a fucking picture asshole" Stan nearly screamed

"What? I was looking at Bebe, she looks fucking hot"

"Yeah…whatever, let's get some shots…I'm going to need alcohol." Stan knew Cartman was lying, but there was not much he could do about that.. not anymore. He did tried to get her back a few times, but he then realized it was just a waste of time, and that he should actually try to move on and give her some space..But until then, he was still very much in love with her.

Wendy and Bebe headed immediately to the shots table to get some tequila. That's when she saw him, Eric was as sexy as ever. He had all that bad boy vibe going on. He was wearing a dark brown leather jacket with a black shirt underneath, the simple outfit enhanced his broad shoulders and strong figure…he is irresistible, no wonder he gets more ass than a toilet seat, it's gonna be thought to go _through_ this night.

After six shots of tequila and some beer, it was fair to say that Wendy was more than a bit tipsy. It was nearly 11pm and she was dancing like crazy with Bebe, trying not to fall of her high heels, but suddenly she noticed that she danced alone, and Bebe was in some corner with Clyde, that smug jock was bound to take her best friend away from Wendy at some point. Oh well, she figured it was best she went looking for someone else to hang.

As she walked around, she spotted something she was definitely not looking forward to. Eric fucking Cartman making out madly with that stupid slut Annie against the wall, she even had her leg up on his waist. God, why all his kisses had to be so fucking heated? Her heart was pounding out of her chest, the jealousy was too much and oh my god, she was going to lose her shit, she was too drunk to stop herself today.

She saw the bear on her hand and didn't think twice.

"Oooops, sorryyy, just in case you weren't wet enough Annie"

"WENDY, THE FUCK?" Eric shouted soaked in beer.

Wendy started to laugh uncontrollably just before she tripped and feel on the floor. At tha,t Annie pissed out of her mind, growled and headed to the bathroom to get herself cleaned up.

At the sight of Eric cursing at her and calling her a stupid crazy bitch she started to cry just as uncontrollably.

"Jesus, how drunk are you, hoe?"

"Very…."

"Come on, bitch, you have to eat something"

He helped her up still a little pissed off, they went to the eating table and he gave her a sandwich and sat her down on the sofa, away from the dance floor and the craziness.

As she ate, he lid up a cigarette and sat beside her.

"So, just what the fuck was that about?"

"Nothing, I just don't like her… and I hate you too so whatever, I just wanted to cock block you…slut"

"Slut? Are you serious?" He laughed at that

"Can't you keep it in your pants just once?"

"Why should I, it's a party Wendy, and what I do with my dick isn't really any of your damn business you bitch"

"Can't you stop being a dick to me? Oh my god, it's getting old, I never did anything to you"

"I believe you just, quote 'cock blocked me'"

"Yeah, it was for your own good, that bitch is full of stds."

"Whatever, you're full of shit, just stay out of my fucking night" With that, Eric stood up and putted out his cigarette

"Where are you going?"

"Back into the party, it's getting cold out here"

"Yeah, I know…just…can you stay here with me a bit?"

Eric growled and sat back down. When he looked back at her, he noticed she was shivering with the cold breeze.

"Here hoe" Eric putted his jacket around her. Just how long was she going to make him stay there, looking at her and feeling trapped? She was so close he could smell her scent; he could feel her heat even with the cold approaching bit by bit. What was he supposed to do? He didn't know how to act around her, especially when she was looking at him like that, with those huge incredible blue eyes. 'She must be drunk out of her mind to want my company' he thought.

Wendy was frozen in place, looking at him, a small smile forming in her lips, she wanted to hug him, to kiss him, she couldn't take her eyes off of his, and it was starting to get awkward.

"Stop it Wendy" Eric said looking away

"Stop what?"

"Stop looking at me, I don't know what the hell do you want but just don't look at me like that, it's weird"

" I…I'm just happy that we're spending some time together and you're not yelling at me for once."

"That's because you're drunk, it's no fun, you'll just start crying again"

"Yeah, because it's hurtful when you became so aggressive for no reason"

"What? Dude we always fight and you are just as aggressive to me, and what the fuck is up with the sensitivity all of the sudden? You are not sensitive, like ever."

"Maybe I am just telling you that because of the liquid courage I just drank a shit load of"

"And since when do you drink?"

"Since…since I need to drink to get me _through_ the night" 'What? What the fuck was that' she thought, she was starting to talk too much, but she was having a really hard time stopping herself now.

"If this is because of Stan, that fag asshole is still into you, he doesn't stop talking about you're bitchy ass, Wendy this, Wendy that, its fucking annoying, still don't know what he sees in you tho"

Wendy just couldn't deal with his crap, not tonight, she was too emotional right now.

"Fuck you Cartman, seriously, go fuck yourself"

"Woow, calm down hoe"

"No, go fuck yourself, who are you to talk about Stan? You're the asshole who's sleeping with that ugly slutty bitch Annie"

"How cute, are you jelly Wendy?"

"No…" she lied. Then she looked at him again, his hazel eyes meeting hers, their legs touching, her head spinning. "You know what? Fuck it, yes I am, I am jealous"

His eyes widened… What? What was she talking about?

"Why?"

Oh fuck… What the hell was she about to do?

"Maybe because you fucking kissed me last year and never explained why, you asshole, you don't screw with a girls head like that"

"No, we are NOT talking about that"

"Yes we are, was I part of some scheme or something? Was I just a "fun time " to you? Cause I think it's a little weird that you would do that to some girl that you've known and hated all your life."

" I just felt like it, let it go already, I had even forgotten about that shit" Lies, he was far from forgetting it, and so was she. Wendy was feeling her tears coming once again. The thought of him kissing her so fervently and then, all of the sudden, leaving the party and not looking back, leaving her there alone with absolutely no explanation.. It just hurt too much. She loved that asshole, and he just told her it didn't mean anything? To her, that make out section meant the world. She couldn't handle it anymore.

"FORGOT ABOUT IT? God you are SUCH an asshole, all you do is hurt me, all you do is mess with my head, and then you ask why I'm drinking? Fuck you" she said as her tears started to fall again

At that moment, Eric couldn't believe her words, she really was hurt and because of him..

Eric stood there in silence, as her tears started to fall more and more, and she was devastated, he could she shame in her eyes, and he could see desperation as she started to talk again.

"Can't you see what you're doing to me? Can't you see the amount of pain and confusion you are putting me through? Always making me feel worthless and unwanted, and for what reason? You shouldn't have done that last year, you shouldn't have kissed me like that and then left without looking back. I wish you would just fucking die for what you did to me, for what you do to me every day" she was out of her mind, she was definitely giving out to much, but she honestly couldn't care less about it now, and Eric? He was there, just staring blankly at her, nothing to say, just an unreadable look on his face.

As for him, he really didn't know what to do or what to say. She was too drunk, he couldn't just kiss her or tell her how he felt, mainly because he couldn't even admit it to himself properly. It wasn't just some crush, it was Wendy… he couldn't hurt her again, he couldn't give her anything, he wasn't worth her pain and Eric knew that kissing her now would just make things worse.

As he set there trying to figure out what to do, Wendy got tired of waiting for a reply, she was feeling like shit for everything she said, and the lack of words coming from him could just mean one thing: to him, she was probably just a piece of nothing that he had a bit of fun with once.

"Screw you" hurt and drunk, she stood up and headed out, looking for someone to drive her home, since Bebe was nowhere to be seen. She was shaking with anger and disbelieve. How could he be so heartless?

She left Eric there alone, with a lot on his mind. He thought about going after her, but for what? Eric was in general really god at solving conflicts, but with Wendy, he was always clueless on how to act, he putted his head on his hands. He knew he was no good for her, even if they got together again, he knew he would just break her heart over and over again, if it was any other girl, he wouldn't care, but Wendy? He just couldn't do that to her… He was a broken shell, he had trust issues and a screwed up concept of love. He had a thought life, one he hid from everyone, but he was just to screwed up to give her what she needed, she was better of far away from him.

"Wendy? Oh my god what happened?" the blond girl showed up right after Wendy sent her a text.

"Just take me home Bebe, please, I can't talk about it now"

The way home was silent, Bebe knew her best friend well, and when Wendy didn't want to talk about something, she better keep her questions to herself for a while. But she was growing concerned of the amount of pain her friend was obviously in.

Wendy got to her room, broken and dry of tears, she laid on her bed as she started to sober up bit by bit, she couldn't believe the stuff he said to Cartman, that fucking pig. As she was about to take her makeup off, her phone vibrated, she figured it must be Bebe, but the number on her screen said otherwise.

 _-Tell me when you wake up, we need to talk. E. Cartman-_


	2. Chapter 2

It was around 4 am when Eric got home. He knew he wasn't going to be able to sleep, so he made himself some coffee and went to sit on his porch.

The truth was he didn't really want to think about Wendy, not anymore. It was easier to think about her when he didn't know that she felt something back, when he didn't know that he had a chance with her. She had fucked him over big time with her confession. Eric liked her; He cared for her; he lusted over her like crazy, but he would never let himself love her, and he knew it. He liked the platonic idea of her; he liked to think about her when he was fucking Annie or some other random girl, but most of all, he loved to make her feel like he hated her. When he kissed her, his intentions were never to confuse her, in truth, when he kissed her that one time, he wasn't thinking at all. He was just glad that in the next day thing seemed to be normal between them.

Eric was remembering ninth grade. Mr. Fredrick paired them together on a project that lasted a whole month. They were supposed to prepare a long, well-researched speech to present at the end of the month about a new law project. At first, they were both very apprehensive and angry; they didn't know how that was supposed to work. They figured that they should meet up after school, get the job done and over with as soon as possible.

Wendy would come over after school to his house for a month. In the beginning, it was one hour researching and then she would walk home, but after some time, the tension seemed to smoothen and she would stay longer, an hour doing research, another hour talking, eating, watching Terrance and Phillip.. And then he would (illegally) drive her home safely. They would talk about a lot of things, but one of their favorite topics of conversations was music. They were both into rock n roll; Eric was a metal head while Wendy was more of an alternative rock type of girl. Surprisingly, Eric found himself loving some of the band Wendy would show him. It was an unusual friendship that, for some reason, the both of them were trying really hard to keep a secret. They wouldn't talk about it to anyone else, and whenever their friends asked about the time they were spending together, they would describe it as a nightmare, especially to Stan, who was, at that time, still Wendy's boyfriend. However, it was far from being a nightmare…. She started to spend more and more time with him. They started to find more and more things in common. It was around the end of their first week together that they started to talk about other things aside from school. The conversation would sometimes come across sex since they were two teens full of hormones. At that time, Eric was no longer a virgin, which secretly caught Wendy's interests. Needless to say that the sexual tension was already building up between them. Eric was still a little chubby at that time, but he was becoming a very handsome young man. Wendy was already flowering into a beautiful teenager, and that wasn't left unnoticed by Eric.

It was two weeks completely out of the ordinary. He was finding herself becoming friends with her, laughing with her... There were days when they would just sit next to each other and not say a word, but it wouldn't feel awkward. There were days when they would argue about something stupid, and she would go home early, and it wouldn't feel right… Eric could recall one event, one night when they were alone in Eric's house, and Wendy had to stay late because of a blizzard. It seemed like a normal day on that unusual month where they would just fool around, eating quadruple stuffed Oreos and talk about nothing in particular, but then his mother got home… it was 8 pm in a Thursday, and she was completely drunk and possibly high on meth. When Liane stumbled through the door, Eric and Wendy could see that she was accompanied by some dude, and the both of them headed to her room. The two fourteen-year-olds sit in the living room when the couple upstairs soon started to have very loud and dirty sex. Eric was embarrassed out of his mind, and he didn't really know what to do. He felt awful. At this point, his mom was moaning so loud he couldn't even look at Wendy. Eric put his head on his hands and just looked down at the floor. As his eyes were starting to water, Wendy pulled out some headphones out of her bag pack and casually said, "hey, remember that band I was telling you about? Tell me what you think." He stared at her with vulnerable teary eyes, flushed chicks, a sad expression on his face, and soon he understood what she was trying to do. As soon as his mother's moans were overtaken by the smiths, he started to feel better. It amazes him until this day how she never left his side that night, how she tried to take his head away from that moment, how she handled the situation… They never talked about that night again, she never brought that up, but one thing was certain.: she was the first person ever to see him in an almost vulnerable state, to see his everyday struggles. And he trusted her with that…

The month soon came to an end, and the big day had arrived. They did very well on their speech, their side won and they got an A+ on their project. They felt the urge to celebrate and hug, but they couldn't, not in front of all those people…so they just nodded each other with a small smile. Neither one of them knew how to act after that. Wendy found herself heading to his house out of habit many times, but never got the courage to come back without an excuse. The sad truth is that they never got the chance neither the courage to talk to each other alone after that for a couple of months, and by that time, the bad and harmful relationship between them had been restored. Within a month, they were back with the insults. Wendy was never sure if he was just acting in front of his friends when he would call her a worthless dirty hippie, but it hurt anyway. If he was acting, he could always text her afterwards to explain himself, but he never did. With the beginning of high school, being around each other was becoming increasingly difficult and Wendy seemed more and more annoying to Eric by the day, she was always bitching about something. It seemed like she became a bitter person that couldn't even take the slightest of a joke, a rock was more fun to hang around than her in Eric's view… But somehow he still cared for her; maybe he just missed his friend.

So it's fair to say they were back on being enemies and that month they spent together should be forgotten… but it never was…

It was now almost 5 am and Eric was still on his porch, not feeling sleepy at all. He was now regretting sending that message to her, he didn't want to talk to her for he didn't know what to say… all he truly wanted was to finish high school with no drama, move out of this god-forsaken town and begin a new life. He didn't want to have to care about her and anyone else, besides, he didn't own her anything. They were friends for a month and kissed once, so what? No one had to know how he felt about her then and how he still feels about her now. It was so well hidden and repressed that he wouldn't even admit it to himself. He'd rather just not deal with it at all. Given the intensity of his personality, once his emotions had been unleashed there would be no going back.

It was around 10h30 when Wendy woke up, she had an unbelievable headache that was slowly taken aback by an upcoming sense of shame when she slowly started to rewind the events of the previous night. If there was one thing that she could clearly remember was his expression, his emotionless, dead eyes. Eric had the power of staring, he could stare at you for what it would seem like hours without blinking once, and it was awfully intimidating. It made her feel small and powerless around him, something that she didn't like at all.

When she finally snapped out of the memory of Eric's hazel eyes, she suddenly remembered the message he sent her the previous night. If it was any other day, she would have contemplated her moves better, but today, she was hungry for answers, it was all she wanted, to understand, to be free from all that confusion that was killing her. She rolled to her side to get her phone:

"I'm up…- W.T."

Every minute she waited for him to answer the message felt like hours. She looked at her phone every thirty seconds or so, but she had absolute no reply from him until 2 pm in the afternoon. "Can you come over? E. Cartman"

"I'll be there in 20 minutes – W.T."

She was trying not to think too much as she made her way to his house. Her heart was pounding, and she was so nervous she knew that if she stopped walking she wouldn't be able to move out of her place for a long time. The way to his house was way too familiar. It's been years since she last walked through this path, and memories were starting to come back. Memories of that unforgettable month she spent with him, a month which she was, until this day, hoping it would somehow come back. Every day she would wake up expecting she could just come back to his place, and feel happy again. Ever since the last time she's been there she was left with a feeling of unfinished business, and it got worst after that kiss, a lot worst, and now she was just hoping this talk could make thing better, if that was possible.

Soon she found herself at his doorstep, and now she could feel how nervous and uncomfortable she was. After a few deep breaths, she rang the bell. It didn't take him to long to open the door for her.

The both of them just stood in silence at his doorstep for a few seconds that felt like minutes.

"Come inside…." Eric said with a low tone.

They both set on the couch, side by side. Wendy was looking at him, Eric, however, was not looking at her; he stared blankly into the wall avoiding her desperate gaze.

After a few moments, Eric took a deep breath and started to talk:

"I was remembering ninth grade you know…. How we were friends somehow..." – He made a long pause to light up a cigarette "Wendy, I… I don't really know what to say about that kiss, but if it hurt you so much, I am sorry. I really am...I never meant to cause you pain, that was never my intention..." Eric knew how out of character it was for him to say those words, being appropriate was never something he cared to do. ".. but about the insults and you know, how we act around each other every day, that just how we row isn't it?" After saying that, Eric turned to finally look at Wendy, she still had the same pleading, hopeful eyes

"…I guess... But why?"

"That's just how it is, and how it's supposed to be. Look, I called you here because I wanted to tell you personally to let go of that night, It was a stupid mistake that we made, and I'm sorry for that, but it didn't mean anything Wendy… That month we spent together in ninth grade was honestly one of the best months of my life but let's be real here, we've both changed a lot since then, and we should just... Forget about it. Soon we'll be out of this town, in our separate ways, never to see each other again and I think it's for the best.."

He was now wearing that same emotionless, cold, dead expression. His words came out of his mouth like a bullet right into Wendy's chest. She was so unbelievably hurt that she just couldn't react to what he said. Suddenly, all emotion was drained out of her eyes, her sweet and naïve expression was slowly being replaced by darkness on her face. However, she still said nothing, nor did she move.

"Anyway, you know your way out right?" Eric then stood up put his jacket on and headed out the door.

Wendy soon heard the engine of his truck starting and him pulling out of his driveway. Only then she found her breath and the first tear fell, a tear which was followed by many, many more, and she still stood alone in his badly illuminated living room. The scent of his cologne and cigarette still there with her. Still not finding the strength to move, she lay down on his couch and cried alone. She was feeling completely helpless as she started to sob loudly. Her head was full of unwanted thoughts; she hated herself more than ever and didn't know why. She was embarrassed and ashamed, feeling hopeless and disoriented. She loved him more than she could stand. After fifteen minutes with nonstop crying, she felt it was best if she just went home, soon he was going to come back, and she did not want to see him under any circumstances. She grabbed her coat and headed back to her house.

"Yeah dude, it's just not as funny anymore you know. I think I'm growing out of fart jokes..."

"Wow Stan, it took you ten years to grow out of fart jokes? Dear Moses, it was about time don't you think?"

"Whatever Kyle, I bet you still fap to it haha"

"Holy shit, IT WAS JUST ONE TIME and it was because of Celine Dion, shut up about it Stan!"

"Never! It's the price you pay for not locking your door and-" The boys conversation was suddenly interrupted by the sound of a speeding black truck in the highway

"….was that cartman's truck?" Kyle said

"I think so.. fatass was speeding more than usual".

"Where the hell's he going? Is he heading out of town?"

"Think so…last time he did that he was punching lockers for a week, it's probably some mental breakdown"

"Should we.. do something?"

"..Nah, we better stay out of it, it's not like we really care anyway..."

Eric's car was soon out of the boy's sight.

Whenever Eric felt like he was about to lose the control he would run. Eric was no longer the type of guy who would run from his responsibilities, but when it came to relationships and emotions, he was unable to deal. He was not expecting that saying those cold words to Wendy would be so hard on him, but it was. He knew it had to be done... He didn't want to see her hurt, he didn't want to leave her alone, but he left, he left her all alone because that was the right thing to do. And for once he wanted to do the right thing, even if it didn't look that way at all.

Eric was now parked at the outside of the town, sitting in the hood of his car, trying really hard to fight back his tears. He was trying not to think about what just happened, but he couldn't. The memory of her so close to him was so vivid he swore he could still smell her perfume, and the sore feeling was getting intense. Sadness was becoming anger by the minute as he realized maybe he just lost her forever. He was waiting for that feeling of indifference to cross his heart, but it just didn't come, instead, the feeling of incapacity was becoming so intense it was painful, he was shaking. A moment of overbearing rage came as his fist slammed against the hood of his truck over and over again, and he only stopped when he saw blood on his hands… At that moment, he broke down, the tears fell and he screamed…. Eric Cartman had cracked.. for the first time in his life.

***********PLEASE REVIEW 3 Thanks for reading, let me know if you're liking the story so far so I can post more :) I'm open to suggestions! ps.: sorry for any possible grammar mistakes *************


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